Ep 24 - Dear Dr. Shiloh: Why Do They Always Come Back When I'm Finally Doing Better?

You finally stopped crying. You finally stopped checking their social media. You finally started healing. And then they texted. If you've ever wondered why an ex seems to reappear the moment you're finally moving on, you're not alone.

In this Dear Dr. Shiloh episode, we unpack the psychology behind why people often come back after you've stopped chasing, the difference between missing you and missing access to you, and how to recognize whether someone's return is evidence of genuine change or simply a reaction to losing the role you once played in their life. We'll also explore why hope can cloud our judgment, how attachment affects our decision-making, and one lesson I learned the hard way after leaving an abusive marriage. Because sometimes people come back. But that doesn't automatically mean they're different.

Key Takeaways

• A text message is not proof of transformation.

• Missing access and missing intimacy are not the same thing.

• Hope can sometimes cause us to ignore evidence.

• Healthy reconciliation requires accountability and consistency.

• Healing is revealed by what you do when they return.

Resources

The Unbothered Button Get your copy today!

Learn practical strategies for setting healthy boundaries, protecting your peace, and breaking free from emotional patterns that keep you stuck.

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New episodes are released every Tuesday on Apple Podcasts and Spotify.

Connect with Dr. Shiloh

Website: www.drshilohspeaks.com

Instagram: @drshilohspeaks or @thebecomingunbotheredpodcast

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