Dr. Shiloh's Blog
You worked for it. You prayed for it. You made sacrifices, stayed up late, pushed through difficult seasons, and told yourself that someday, when you finally got there, everything would feel different.
And then you got there. The promotion came through. The business started making money. You bought...
I heard a psychologist say recently that people-pleasing can be a low-level form of narcissism. My immediate reaction was basically, Well, that’s offensive. Mostly because I thought they might have a point.
Now, before anyone gets upset, I am absolutely not saying that being a people pleaser means ...
Most of us want to be chosen. We want the relationship. We want the friendship. We want the job. We want the invitation. We want someone to look at us and say, “You. You’re the one I want.”
And there is nothing wrong with that. Being chosen feels good. The problem begins when we start confusing bei...
One of the most common relationship questions I have encountered throughout my career is surprisingly simple: Why do they always seem to come back when I am finally doing better?
The details may change from person to person, but the pattern is remarkably consistent. Someone spends months grieving t...
One of the saddest statements I hear in counseling is not, “We got divorced.” It is not even, “They betrayed me.”
It is this, “I don’t even know who I am anymore.”
When people say those words, they are usually not describing something that happened overnight. They are describing a slow disappearan...
Have you ever found yourself asking, "Why do they keep doing this?"
Maybe it's the family member who continues offering unsolicited opinions about your life. Maybe it's the friend who only reaches out when they need something. Maybe it's the coworker who somehow keeps handing their responsibilities...
Have you ever walked away from a conversation feeling emotionally exhausted and wondered what just happened? You started the day feeling fine. Your coffee was hot. Your to-do list was manageable. Nothing major was wrong.
Then you talked to someone. Maybe it was a family member. A coworker. A friend...
Most of us grow up believing that being nice is a virtue. We are praised for being agreeable. Rewarded for being accommodating. Encouraged to avoid conflict.
But there is a subtle point where kindness stops being healthy and begins turning into self-abandonment. And many people never realize when t...
